dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
