We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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