Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize