Your favorite bartender is back from prision
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
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