Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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