Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
