I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
