It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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