did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Randomize