Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
