Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
