thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize