i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize
