More tranny stories later!
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
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