the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
