the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Randomize
