I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize
