If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Randomize
