I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Randomize
