don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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