so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
