i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
