google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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