proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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