Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
