"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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