He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
