My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize
