My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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