Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Randomize