its not stalking. its research.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
