franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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