Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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