i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize