You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I need to calm my uterus...
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Randomize
