That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
