maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Randomize
