high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Randomize
