I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
