Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
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