OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
