People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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