Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
i think i have herpe
just one?
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
