Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Randomize