I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
