Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
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