Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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