If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
My balls are so social today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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