HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
