Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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