How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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